therealstevesmith

The NBA at the 27.3% Point

             January 4, 2007

   You need a tip for discussing the NBA when you're hanging out with the guys. Fantasy Leagues make it important to look at athletes like boots, you may keep 'em too long, but man, do they feel good.

    If you want a team to be on the lookout for, a crew that could earn you some money for the next month, go with the Houston Rockets. Right now they're 14-18 versus the points, and that is sure to go up, as their point differential is a healthy +5. 6 ppg. They're ripe to be underestimated going without Yao, and with a couple of weeks to adjust, they look ready to roll. Mix in the fact that their next four games are against teams that beat them against the point spread previously, and somebody should read this and send me some ckizash. For entertainment purposes right now.

AI to Nuggets. Asian Kids Work Overtime

                              December 20, @))^

      I don't know if the Denver Nuggets will become a contender with Allen Iverson, but I'm sure jerseys are being made somewhere not in America to celebrate this refreshing change.

      You tell me who owns the Nuggets, but I'll tell you he's about to get PIF like a mug.

       "Wake up those girls with the tiny hands, we got some jerseys to make! I don't care if they have to up the pay to $1.50 a day, let's git er done... 'What'?"

      I'd come hard (as always) and start with a classic David Thompson, real smooth, like you could rock dress shoes with it. Sell just a thousand of those at $169.99 a pop and that'll probably take care of the reserved parking spot for the year, right dey.

     Only then would I come with the current Denver jersey, using the leftover profit from the classic jersey to pay for the cost of the increased order to that shop that used to be in America. Hey, the NBA is a global sport.

      After all the kids have the new New Iverson jersey, then you can dip in with a tight Alex English (hood alert! click this) style one. The irony being of course that neither man has ever been recognized for ALL of his skills.

      If you don't think Allen Iverson is perfect for any team he plays for, then you must know a lot about astronomy.

      Meanwhile, let's hope those jersey makers don't have to use that new NBA ball in the corporate gym.

The Litmus Test

                 June 1, 2006

       I blame the Dream Team. If Magic, Michael, Barkley and the crew don't go to Barcelona, then  a youthful Dirk Nowitzki in Germany and a soccer playing Steve Nash in Canada don't go all ga-ga and start hooping their heads off.

     But the big day has arrived, and like a NFL Conference championship game featuring two black quarterbacks... we's about to have an NBA Championship series with a team led by a white superstar for the first time since the Hick from French Lick days.

    For the math impaired, that would be Larry Bird, exactly 20 years ago.

     However, this is a much different world than it was 20 years ago, according to people who use 9/11 as an excuse to divest us of our personal liberties and kill brown people.  The nation is completely patriotic and nothing is more important than preserving the American way of life.

     So white people have to decide.  It's going to be either Shaq or Ben Wallace leading the Eastern Confernce rep in the Finals.  Who does white America value more? Americans or white people?

    If history is any indication, we all may as well go back to Shaqrifa. During the 2004 Olympics, white people openly rooted against the Men's basketball team, even though they had such "good guys" as Lebron James and Tim Duncan. 

    Not because they're black, of course.  Oh no, the team was hated on because some of them wore jewelery.  And had the nerve to get some tatoos.  A couple of the guys had actually purchased REAL ESTATE, of all things, with their millions.  So it's easy to see how patriotic Americans might go for the dashing Dirk over the mumbling O'neal, or the smart (how many times will we hear that word beginning June 8?) Nash over the big Ben (cornfro) Wallace.

Dirty Laundry

               May 22, 2006

    Dennis Miller once said about sports teams that with all the free agency, we're basically rooting for laundry when we support our favorite teams. 

   And now all my teams are ghost. Lakers lose, Cavaliers go down tragically, the Spurs dynasty is still an every-other-year-thing, and now the Clippers played like, well, the Clippers in game seven against the Suns tonight.

   It's a good thing I only follow the sports I like, otherwise it wouldn't be much fun watching the rest of the NBA playoffs. As it is, I think the next round will be intense and can't wait to figure out who I'm rooting for. So they can lose. (Poor Detroit. Poor Dallas).

K.O.B.E.

               May 18, 2006

    It's kinda obvious Bryant engineers.  He can use any situation to get inside the heads of the other players. Imagine Chris Webber watching TNT tonight and seeing ocho

                 1. Kick out Barkley's energy

                 2. Kill other basketball "experts"

                 3. Kibosh opinion by enemies

                 4. Keep old ballers encheck

And the list could go on and on.

Bryant on TNT - Explosive?

                         May 16, 2006

   Ernie Johnson announced that Kobe Bryant will be the in studio guest Wednesday during the Cleveland Pistons and Spurs Mavs games (sic).

    This is gunslinging on a tightrope. In the wind, while it's raining. Charles Bark (no bite) ley accused '24' of basically throwing game seven in this year's playoffs vs. the Suns. The abuse Bryant took after that game, though he previously scored fitty in a losing effort, makes him the closest thing we have to a Michael Jackson nowadays.

   I'm already impressed because Kid Skills is putting himself in a situation that he can't control.  I guess if it gets out of hand, Kobe can say, "Hey Chuck, what's that blackjack table doing over there?" and then sock him in the mouth.

   Whatever happens, I think the 4th of July might be coming early to TNT.

Lakers, Tramps and Thieves

          May 6, 2006    3rd Quarter of the Lakers/Suns Game

Laker: Devean George

Time he's had us in prison-  7 years

Number of Tools - 2

Tools - Missing jumpshots and getting blown past.

Amount of Theft - 24 million

Tramp: Kwame Brown

Time He's Been in Prison - 5 years

Number of Tools  -  2

Tools -  Roberto Duran like hands and hating basketball

Amount of theft - Put it this way. Only 64 players in the NBA earn more.  Roughly 359 steal less.

Thief: Luke Walton

Years he's had us in prison -  3

Number of Tools -  2

Tool -  Affirmative Action and "worst college star in the history of the NBA" award.

Amount of theft - incalculable, because broadcasters perpetrate the myth that he's smarter than the rest of the league.

NBA's MVP? Look It Up

                                     April 27, 2006

         I've been thinking about Steve Nash winning a 2nd consecutive Most Valuable Player award and every time I'm ready to just dog him out like I went to Georgia, I see that sweet jumper he has and just say "Dayme."  What he's done this year IS the analogy we often use about the greatest players, "Wilt-Kareem-Michael-Shaq... and 4 guys from the 'Y' could win 60 games."  Nash has taken a brand new team, except for the Matrix, and arguably had a better season than last year.

     But just before I went to the polls to cast my vote, I decided to look up the word 'valuable' at dictionary.com. Here it is..

valuable

adj 1: having great material or monetary value especially for use or exchange; "another human being equally valuable in the sight of God"; "a valuable diamond" [ant: worthless] 2: having worth or merit or value; "a valuable friend"; "a good and worthful man" [syn: worthful] 3: of great importance or use or service; "useful information"; "valuable advice" [syn: useful, of value] n : something of value; "all our valuables were stolen"

And if that don't scream KOBE BRYANT then I drummed forJourney.

      Bryant led more than his team. He led the NBA. He's the lead singer of the league, fronting a young group of backups to 45 wins and the 7th seed, in the WEST!

      He spent the whole season showing his 'mates how to score, take the contact, get mad at the ref, isolate a weakness, make a big shot with the 24 second clock winding down, hustle, and play with a confidence that allows you to make mistakes and still be the best.

       That's what most folks don't get. Kobe Bryant plays hoops like a baseball player. He's not expecting to shoot 50% because he thinks he can make every shot.         

A Cool New Site

                    April 10, 2006

        My hip cat Chino turned me on to a great site if you're a serious fan of the NBA.  I think of silly stats all the time, that I don't know how to quantify into actual info. Whoever runs this site is WAY ahead of a brother. It's called 82games.com

Final fo

                     March 31, 2006

      Going into college basketball's championship weekend, I find myself in 1,686,643rd place in ESPN's contest.  My sympathy to anyone doing worse than me.  So like a Kobe Bryant 2nd half, I move forward with the serious lowdown on who's gonna win this thing.

           Florida minus 6 versus George Mason: Put that kiznake on Geroge Mason. The reason this number is so high is that the oddsmaker figures GMU will have to foul in the end and that will get the number up there.  Don't believe it. There's one thing all these higher seed teams experience when the play the Patriots. Fear.  ALL of the pressure is on Florida. These fools are just kids. George Mason 67  -  Florida 65

            LSU minus 2 versus UCLA, Total points listed at 121.5.  This game is so under the total it's not even funny.  UCLA has allowed one team to score more than 60 points in it's last 12 games. Unless Big Baby is Carmelo Anthony, I can't see ANOTHER freshman leading a team to the title.  So considering that, my predicted score is UCLA 58 - LSU 55.

           I know everyone wants me to pick George Mason to win the whole thing, since I'm so trendy and astute. Can't do it.  Wouldn't be prudent (wait, wrong George).  But the fact is that by championship night, GMU players will be nervous too. That's all ANY of the higher seeds have been waiting for.  History reigns supreme in a low scoring thriller,  UCLA 60 George Mason 53

  Don't forget, if you're in Las Vegas or someplace like that, play that under on the UCLA-LSU tilt. For entertainment purposes only, G.